lesson 5: WHO ARE YOU CALLIN' A DEADBEAT?

   Some people, if they didn't know me personally and if they were to look at the statistics, might try put me in this category :) Say that to me in front of my kids and see how well you fare though :) The problem here is a common misconception that if a man owes a large sum of back child support he obviously is a worthless piece of crap that deserves to be behind bars. Or that he should have his wages garnished and tax returns confiscated until what he owes is paid in full. I'll tell you something, I've spent the last 15 years of my life trying to play by their rules. I've tried several times to get my life in order by getting a "real" job, securing a home for me and for my boys to spend time with me, but every time i do, along comes good old friend of the court, raping n pillaging my check, leaving me with anywhere from 90 to 120 bucks a week to pay my bills and rent. Lets see you pay the bills on $100 a week. Ultimately forcing me to quit my jobs and go under the table, only to have my money raped and pillaged by any number of random self serving "entreprenuers". If you work under the table you know what I mean by that :) Basically taking from me the ability to live. I have been forced to sacrifice my well being in order to simply remain a part of my childrens lives. No matter what my circumstances were, it wasn't there fault, and they shouldn't have to suffer for it. I'm sure it was as hard on them as it was me though. You see, my kids worshiped the ground I walked on and they we're my only reason to even want to live. In their eyes I was superman, impervious to pain, faster, smarter and stronger than any man alive. That's a lot to try to live up to, but I did my best to be exactly that for them. I have been a constant presence, a loving father and a strong influence in my kids lives since day one. Does that make me a deadbeat? I think not! The deadbeat is the guy that does absolutely nothing for his kids! He's never a presence or factor in their lives! The deadbeat runs and hides from his responsibility of being a father like a coward! I never hid anything from my kids, they know exactly who I am and what I've been through to be where I am today. I've done everything in my power to be there for them when they need me to be, and they respect and love me for who I am, what I do for them and what I've been through. No matter what someone says I owe, I've paid my dues! I may not have been the greatest dad in the world, but I've been the best father that I could be. That's a million times better than what my father was for me. Who are you or anyone to judge me? The bottom line is this, if you're a father who suffers under the same set of oppressive circumstances, keep your head up, let your kids know how much you love them, and find your strength and resolve in their love for you :) To all the TRUE DEADBEATS out there, shame on you! Be a man and step up to the plate! No matter how great the sacrifice! Because your children suffer without your love and guidance! Lastly, to all the self righteous judgemental asstards out there, mind your own damn business and tend to your own affairs! I LOVE YOU AERYK, ANTHONY n KELSIE :) -Steve Burns